Jacquelyn Lee Bristow

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Jacquelyn Lee Bristow was born on March 17, 1988, accompanied by her identical twin sister Emily. Jackie was born in West Covina, California to her proud and loving parents, Joan and Grant. She and Emily, with their two older brothers made a wonderful, blessed family of 6.

Jackie was baptized and received her first Holy Communion at St. Christopher's Church in West Covina. She attended Kindergarten through fifth grade at St. Christopher's School. While in first grade, Jackie began piano lessons.

In her sixth grade year, the family began attending Holy Name of Mary Church in San Dimas. Jackie and Emily transferred to the school. Jackie was incredibly intelligent and friendly. Jackie won the Outstanding Student award in eighth grade, played on the basketball team, and was on the Academic Decathlon team.

Jackie entered St. Lucy's Priory High School in Glendora as a freshman. She did well. She studied hard and got excellent grades. She was a semi-finalist in the National Merit Scholarship Competition. In her sophomore year, she joined the St. Lucy's Cross Country team. Jackie was a team favorite. In her last year she won the "Most Inspirational" award, for her humor, perseverance, and leadership.

Jackie continued piano lessons until she was 16. For a year, she played piano at Holy Name of Mary Church, filling in when a pianist was needed. Throughout high school and college, she continued to sing in the Sunday night youth choir at Holy Name of Mary, in San Dimas.

While in High School, Jackie and her sister Emily started Venture Crew 443. Venturing is a branch of Boy Scouts that provides co-ed opportunities for high adventure activities like backpacking. Jackie loved the out of doors and was an avid hiker. She tackled several week-long backpacking treks through the California Sierras and Philmont Scout Ranch in New Mexico. As an administrator, Jackie was an exceptional president for the Crew.

Jackie graduated St. Lucy's with honors and attended the University of California, Riverside on a Regent's scholarship. In High School, Jackie had developed her artistic talent, taking several art classes and exhibiting her work at art shows. She was also an aspiring poet. At UC Riverside she pursued art, but had to withdraw from the University during her second quarter because of eating disorder complications.

Jackie worked at Party City in San Dimas during the Halloween season of 2007 and then got her "dream" job at Starbucks in La Verne. Jackie loved working at Starbucks. She loved serving her customers even if it meant starting before the sun rose!

Jackie died on January 1, 2008. Her sister, Emily was with her. She died suddenly of cardiac arrest because of an electrolyte imbalance due to continual binging and purging.

This was Jackie's story. But Jackie was so much more than a list of her accomplishments. Jackie was the light of our world. Her perky attitude could lift lowest spirit. Her love for everyone was a joy to experience. If you knew Jackie, you will remember her for the rest of your life.

But Jackie had problems underneath that happy exterior. We may never know the pain and torture she put herself through. She had a very low self-esteem. She was afraid of letting people down, of not living up to her own expectations, of getting fat. She was full of emotions but couldn't find a way to get them out.

Jackie began binging and purging around 17 years old. When her parents finally realized she needed help, they got her treatment through therapists and psychiatrists. But there are few therapists and fewer psychiatrists that know how to treat eating disorders. Jackie continued to spiral down, out of control. When she went away to college, she had a seizure. The doctors in the emergency room said it was a deficiency in potassium; a consequence of binging and purging.

Jackie was admitted to an out-patient, intensive therapy program for eating disorders. She did better, but still struggled. The insurance company was continually saying she was "cured" and discontinued funding her treatment. Eventually, in July, Jackie was discharged. Unfortunately, she was discharged with no referring psychiatrist or therapist. She bounced around, looking for a good fit, until she just stopped trying to find one. Perhaps this was part of the disorder.

Jacquelyn Lee Bristow died on January 1, 2008.

Jackie's life was a blessing to all of us who knew her.


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Others' comments:

2010
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Signed:
Hello, beautiful girl! (January 19, 2010)
Hey sweetpea, dearheart, love of my life! Jacquelyn Lee, I miss you so much. I promise that you are going to be famous. You are going to be famous for saving the lives of countless men and women with this disorder. I know. I can feel it. Be with me baby girl in my struggle. You know how hard it is. I know how hard it is. I would give anything to keep the family from hurting anymore. I know you've got my back, can you also hold my hand? Great race. Everyone loved seeing you again.
Signed: Your big sister, Wednesday
Srulevitch Family (January 09, 2010)
We will always remember Jackie. Along with all the kids in the troop. Our lives were made that much better. Great being out at the race. Hope to see you soon!
Signed: David and Linda
With You In Spirit (January 08, 2010)
I wish you all a successful 5k event, and I hope this will bring about more awareness to ED.
Signed: Irene Morton
I know (January 08, 2010)
I know. I am 50 years old. I have lived with ED my whole life. He has ruled my family. He took up residence in my household growing up and wreaked havoc from the very start. It doesnt matter what my name is, I could be anybody. The gene was passed down through lineage I can't even know about. My sweet, younger sister fought SO HARD and died 3 years ago, ED killed her savagely too. I suffer too. I battled every day to keep my food in my stomach. I HATE HIM. I DON'T UNDERSTAND HIM! I know it's apart of the diseases of the human condition but sometimes I would rather have something else. Something they could cut out of me in surgery. But I go to therapy, I have been in treatment, I take medicine, I go to OA meetings and seek support. It's hard, but I have chosen not to die. I have people who count on me. So to Jackies' family I say, I know. I know the shame, when people say "oh, how did she die?" Let's talk about ED like we talk about cancer. He's insidious, powerful, and deadly. It's not just a diet. Please don't tell your daughter she's chubby, please. Don't try to squeeze your daughter into the smaller size. Let's fight, I know.
Signed: A fighter, for Wendy
Image (January 07, 2010)
This nation feeds on image in practically everything we end up purchasing by way of sexy thin presentations in all types of media. Its sad, tempting and will inevitably continue. My only advice, offer a person who has E.D. the famous Mexican herbal tea - "estafiate" to get their appetite going and then plenty of moral support!
Signed: Damien Alumni
Jackie's 5K Two (January 06, 2010)
Dear Bristow Family: Thanks so much for reprising this wonderful Memorial Race for Jackie! As a parent, I can't even begin to imagine the grief that you have experienced, but I do take courage from your bravery. Maybe the song is right and "...We'll understand it all by and by." As a fellow runner, I'm so very grateful for the knowledge that Jackie could experience the earthly highs of participating in the running community while she was with you. As an older person, lately I've thinking about how a runner makes their transition -- running silently, quietly to another loving "home." You have my deepest condolences. Thanks again Bristows, and all relatives, friends, classmates, sponsors, donors, volunteers, and runners for renewing this Event. High Regards! See you Saturday!
Signed: KK
Perpetual Hope (January 05, 2010)
Dear Bristows, I was blessed to teach at St. Lucy's from 1994-1999, and now I have the pleasure of working with Joan at Charter Oak High School. This epidemic has plagued women, both young and old, for as long as time, and it is because of your efforts that I hope to see the trend fade, and eventually disappear. My daughter and I will run again this year with you in our hearts. To all those who have been touched by this illness....you are all beautiful to someone!! Never forget that.
Signed: Michelle Ronga
I am her as she is me (January 03, 2010)
I am currently in an outpatient program at UCLA. I have been burging for almost 8 years. I am an undergrad at UCLA. I don't want to die
Signed: Tracey
In My Prayers (January 01, 2010)
To the Bristow Family, You have all been in my thoughts and prayers today. We look forward to a second year at the run (walk) 5K. Jackie's memory is doing wonderful things.
Signed: Falicon Family
(January 01, 2010)
You are on my mind today...may the Lord continue to shower your family with blessings of peace and grace. May the Great Comforter be among you all today. Much love to you all.
Signed: Teri Vail
Love you! (December 31, 2009)
Jackie, I miss you so very much. I can't believe it is two years since you died. See you in heaven Baby.
Signed: Mom
(December 29, 2009)
I was very moved by Jacquelyn's story. It reminds us all of how fragile life can be. My sympathy to her family.
Signed: Twila Ketterman
Another Year (December 29, 2009)
Jackie, you would have loved these races! I hope you are with us again this year. Your life is bringing so much love and support to so many people. I will always love you.
Signed: Dad

2009
And... (February 23, 2009)
I wish I would have heard about the run because I would have loved to have been there to give my support.
Signed: Dana Brewer
SL alumn 2005 (February 23, 2009)
I never personally met Jackie, but when I read the St. Lucy's Alumnae newsletter today and heard of her passing I got chills and almost cried. I am soo sorry to hear this news. From all the comments, she seemed like a wonderful girl and it is truely a tragedy how it happened. I know what it is like to lose a loved one in a sudden way so my thoughts and prayers are with not only her family and friends, but also all the other people out there suffering from eating disorders.
Signed: Dana Brewer
(February 20, 2009)
I ran with Jackie in high school and I remember how incredibly sweet she was. I am terribly sorry to hear what happened. I too was suffering from an eating disorder in high school. When I was in 8th grade I became severely anorexic. In high school I began purging. No one knows to this day. The disease is horrible and very real. I too was quite happy on the outside and appeared to be very successful, but was suffering terribly. I am doing better now, trying to focus my attention on being a strong and healthy runner. I just recently heard about this tragedy, and it really struck me hard. Jackie and Emily were two of the sweetest people I knew on the cross country team. I was not real close to them, but I loved to just say hi and ask how they were doing. Their smiles would light up my day. Jackie was a beautiful girl, and kindness radiated from her... that was nearly 6 years ago for me, and I remember her smile like no other. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. God bless!
Signed:
To The Bristow Family (January 15, 2009)
I wish I could have been there! *HUGS*
Signed: Irene Morton (Shultz)
Been There (January 02, 2009)
I was anorexic at her age, then 6 years later, started binging and purging via excercise. I still struggle with this today. People think I look great becauase I am thin, but they have no idea just how hard I workout just to stay so thin,I wish I could stop and accept myself..but ..
Signed: In my thoughts
Bristow Family (January 01, 2009)
I have been thinking of Jackie today, all day and I remembered the walk on Saturday, unfortunely, I will not be able to attend but Jackie as well as all of you are in my thoughts and prayers more than you'll ever know. She will be missed and remembered always. I pray and know in my heart that her story will someday if not already help others with this disorder. Take Care.
Signed: Love Cynthia
To all the young women (December 31, 2008)
There are SO MANY issues that have not been focused on for our young women... eating disorders are just one of many. Jackie is just one of many casualities to the insane social pressures our girls are dealing with now. Jackie and my daughter were hospitalized at the same time... different conditions... but the same reason. Why do our girls have such low self esteem, why the level of doubt, why the self hate and anger. My daughter is now finally moving forward with her life... but the internal pain is always there -lurking. A key issue to point out is the lack of attention women's disorders have in society... there were millions spent and now made on Viagra... but insurance companies fight us on helping our daughters for mental health. Every week at Mass I see Jackie and Emily singing... Jackie is missed and not forgotten. We are all beautiful....
Signed: Another mom
(December 30, 2008)
eating disorders are a really difficult thing, ESPECIALLY for female distance runners. its difficult to be a runner and watch others who are faster than you who are so thin. you understand they are unhealthy but feel an urge to do as the do. highschool is a difficult time for girls. i myself am still in highschool and feel that the image of jackie is much of the one that others view me. I feel for you jackie, and i am going to try and learn from your experience. I will take control and save myself, and to you I will thank you.
Signed:
Memorial race (December 30, 2008)
I too struggled with anorexia as a female high school runner back in the late 70's. It's not a new disease - it's been around for decades. It's disturbing to know that the medical/insurance/psychiatric industries still don't deal with this well or effectively. My deepest sympathies to the Bristow family. I can't begin to imagine your pain. This race is such a positive and special way to remember Jackie.
Signed: Pam
Memory Eternal (December 30, 2008)
I've known Jackie since the day she was born, watched her grow up and I know she was a wonderful young lady. I miss her so very much. Her memory will always be in my heart.
Signed: Ellen
Just 4 You Jackie (December 30, 2008)
I too can relate to Jackie; i was hospitalized for Anorexia several years prior but have overcome great obstacles. I would be honored to run for Jackie. My prayers are with the Bristow family.
Signed: Heather
Tradgedy Knows No Boundaries (December 29, 2008)
I remember both Jackie and Emily from having patrol meetings at the Mr. & Mrs. Bristows House. The world has suffered a great loss with the passing of Jackie, someone who was full of life and had the ability to accomplish any task she set before herself. To even imagine that a tradgedy like this could happen to a family that I would consider to be the epitome of family love, personal moral's, and acceptance of others. Let us remember Jackie for who she was and continue living to our greatest potential. Let us honor her life by being the best at what we do, just as she did. "We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls." -Winston Churchill
Signed: Darren A. McNeil
Run for Jackie (December 28, 2008)
I have just read Jackie's story. I am very saddened but also touched by it. I will make every effort to run for Jackie on January 3rd. I hope others will do the same. We should all run for Jackie to honor her.
Signed: Andy DiConti
Thank you (December 23, 2008)
Thank you for sharing Jackie's story. It could very well save someone in a similar situation. I am going to spread the word and, hopefully, get a few others to participate in the memorial run.
Signed: George
MY COUSIN (December 18, 2008)
Jackie was my little cousin. I can't believe that she is gone, but she will always be alive in my heart and memories. This walk is a great way to raise awareness about eating disorders and to remember Jackie. I love you Jackie and miss you!
Signed: Sara
Powerful (December 16, 2008)
Dear Joan and Family- Your ability to take a tragedy and turn it into a gift for others is truly powerful! We can't wait to support your cause!
Signed: Michelle Ronga COHS
Inspirational (December 13, 2008)
I just learned of Jackie's walk. What an inspired plan for such an inspirational family and inspirational young woman that Jackie was. Your faith in God and strength as a family shine through in every step you take during this painful journey. Your willingness to share your story is such a testiment to your good hearts. We continue to be blessed by your example. Love Tom & Bobbi Kay and the Kay kids.
Signed: Bobbi Kay
To the Spirit That Will Live On. (December 12, 2008)
Remembering Jackie and her family. We look forward to the race in memory of Jackie. Her spirit will live on through her family and through their commitment to their faith. Jackie's light shines on! God bless all those battling this disease. In Christ, The Smith Family
Signed: Giselle Smith
Bristow Family (December 11, 2008)
Hello. Darin and I think of Jackie all the time. I keep a one of her hand pictures framed in our living room. She remains a source of strength for me. I think of your whole family all the time. Darin and I will be at the race. All of our love, Tara Redepenning and Darin Goulet
Signed: Tara
Jackie I love you! (December 08, 2008)
There isn't a day that I don't miss your lovely face, cry for you, miss holding your hand. I will always love you with all my heart.
Signed: Dad